she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
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But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
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Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
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