Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
Randomize
