She went from zero to smokin in five shots
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
Randomize
