Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
tell me about the eggs
Randomize