I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize
