I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
Randomize
