You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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