Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize
