how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
Randomize