well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
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