is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
Randomize
