he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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