Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
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