Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
Randomize
