I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
Randomize
