Ambien. No doubt about it.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
How did I get home last night?
We put your keys on a lanyard that asked anyone that found you to bring you home. A nice man in a cape, green shorts and a mesh shirt dropped you off this morning.
Oh. Yeah. Riiiggghhht
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
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