I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
I need to align my fucking chakras
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize
