I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Btw I puked in your glovebox
Randomize
