what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
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