i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
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