saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
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