'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
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