My first STD was from a foam party
We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize
