I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
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