Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
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I like how I get messages from eharmony at the same time I'm looking for a new vibrator. It's like the powers that be are just trying to make my life ironic.
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
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That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
there is glitter all over my balls
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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