He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
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