that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
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