please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
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