What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
Crap I still need to get you a wedding gift. I'm just gonna give you a bag full of cash, lube, and condoms. And I'll use furry handcuffs instead of ribbon to tie the gift bag handles together.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Two words: nipple clamps
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