What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
Randomize
