Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
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