He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
Randomize
