Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
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I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
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