he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
I'm so stoned I just sat here for like at least 45 min thinking about how I would get some jack in the box tacos if only I knew where my wallet was and then I kind of blinked and finally noticed I had literally been staring at my wallet the ENTIRE fucking time
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
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