I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
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