Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
Randomize