What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
Randomize
