? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
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