i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
Randomize
