butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
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