I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Randomize
