There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
Randomize
