hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
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