Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
