i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
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