You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
