I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
A bitchslap is in order.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Randomize
