I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Randomize
