Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
ALERT: Turns out when I'm drunk I turn into a clepto. I just found keys, a ketchup bottle, and sweatshirt in my backpack that don't belong to me. If yours, come collect from me. I'm still drunk in the back of biology lecture.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
Randomize
