it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
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so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
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