He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
Randomize
